Updated: Sep 17
Spirit came by when I least expected it.
It was a usual Saturday, getting caught up on business stuff and house work. I had to pick up a package for my husband that was right beside the oil change place. Every time I get my oil changed there is always a line up! But not this time…ok sweet this won’t take long. Let’s get this over with.
Now which stall do I pick? One of the workers came outside and pointed to the stall that was almost done. The young man helping me with the oil change was so kind and I could feel his good energy when he talked to me. I can always tell by the look in someone’s eye or by their smile that they are a kind human.
I was scrolling Instagram while I waited then something caught my attention and I started to stare off into the distance. When I “zone” out for those couple seconds my mind isn’t really thinking about too much. Then I heard a voice, “hey someone lost their mom”. I thought okay what is going on, is there a spirit about to come into my awareness. Sure enough this women comes by (I’m seeing this in my minds eye) and she is so full of joy. She’s a proud mother, she starts showing me a photo album and flips to the the photo of her and her son. He was sitting on her lap and she was reading him a book. I started to doubt this vision wondering where did this come from? Then my heart started racing and I could feel my armpits getting clammy. I know from past experience that this is a sign from spirit to confirm that this is all happening right now…you are not imagining this, this is real, the connection is on. It’s like my spirit detector, sweaty pits and a racing heart.
I froze and didn’t know what to do next. She wanted me to get her son’s attention, I knew her son was the man doing my oil change. I am not Theresa Caputo, I can’t deliver a message from spirit to a stranger that I have no idea if they believe in this connection.
There’s a term called “drive by readings”, this is when you’re at the grocery store and you deliver a message to a stranger. From what I’ve heard about these types of readings is sometimes they do not go well. I don’t know how this person is handling their grief and I want to respect this. I understand that this is a beautiful gift to deliver this message but it’s a gamble on how the delivery of this message would go. I’ve also heard other mediums say we cannot choose who does or does not receive a message, we are working for the world of spirit. I thought I had strong boundaries and an agreement that I am not “working” when my light is off. I light a candle as a sign to the spirit world, that I am ready. No candles were lit today! I was surprised this women was able to come through so strongly.
I was then distracted by her son asking about fuel filters and checking the brake lights. Then I saw her again, she was admiring her son. She stood there with her hand on her heart and a big smile on her face as a tear fell down her cheek . My heart filled up with so much love, I could feel the love she had for her son and this proud moment she was having. She wanted me me to tell her son that she was so proud of the kind man he grew up to be.
I texted my husband quickly and told him what was happening. He was encouraging me to believe in myself and my connection to spirit. His support means so much to me and he is so understanding of my world.
After the fuel filter was done you have to turn the key on and off 6 times, so I sat with this man for a couple minutes and I still couldn’t deliver this message. The oil change was complete and I was trying to pay on the debit machine and I was just button mashing not paying attention, he probably wondered what is this lady doing. I couldn’t concentrate at the the task at hand, I was frazzled. I figured out the debit machine and he opened the garage door. I smiled at him and he had that twinkle in his eye. I drove away without delivering this message to this kind soul.
I started driving wondering what did I just do, his mom was still around me I could see and feel her. I told her I’m so so sorry I could not deliver this message to your beloved son. I felt this immense guilt. I almost turned the car around. Then I thought of a plan, I told this lovely woman to deliver her message to her son tonight in his dreams. I feel like after I left, his soul knew what was going on so I trust this connection will be made in dream time.
I felt a bit better about the situation, the message will still be delivered. Soon after I felt her spirit leave me. But I still couldn’t shake this guilt, I pulled into the grocery store parking lot and I sat there and let everything sink in. I started crying, that was a lot of emotions to feel in a short amount of time. I have to process my own emotions and the spirit’s emotions when they are in my awareness. Even though I came up with a solution, I felt like I let spirit down. I released this feeling through my tears.
It’s been a while since I’ve had this strong of a connection while just out and about doing every day things. These connections happen when I am in a Reiki session when there is intention behind my practise to connect to the spirit world by lighting my candle.
As I write this I think back about how much work the spirit world does on their end to make these connections happen. This woman had to find me, I had to go to the oil change place today which I almost didn’t, I have to pick that stall with this kind man and make sure he is working and not on break. All of this has to line up. It amazes me.
I asked spirit for a sign in the form of a heart shaped leaf to confirm that the message was delivered to this man. Now we’ll wait and see.
Update: I received this sign on a button I found while going through a box of stuff a couple days later. It had a heart shaped clover leaf that I had worn on St Patrick’s Day with my Grandma years ago. I feel she was helping me that day as well.